My ex-boss was discussing my future promotion.
I asked him what makes him decide when to promote someone. His answer was “You get promoted when you’re already doing what the promoted person is doing.”
“Fake it till you have become it.”
Fake it till you make it sounds like a catchy phrase that you often hear but it’s a little more scientific than it sounds.
It may sound at first as the general notion is that if you are happy, you smile or laugh, and if you are sad, you frown or cry. However, physiological and psychological studies dictate that your affect can determine your mood too.
Your mind observes your behavior to regulate your mood. This means, if you force a smile, your mood may start to elevate and if you force a frown, inevitably you’ll start feeling low.
The affect and mood relationship is reciprocal and not a one-way street. But there is a fine line between faking it till you make it and flat out lying.
The cliched phrase concerns itself with faking behaviours; looking more confident, appearing approachable, and how your body language can aid in a feeling of empowerment.
It’s okay to display behaviour that seems stronger and more confident, but it is not okay to fake competencies. It merely suggests that if you want to inculcate a quality, you just have to behave as you already got it.
If you start faking competencies, it will start creating issues around trust and professionalism. Not to forget that faking competencies is unethical.
Is it deception on some level? Maybe yes. But it’s a little white lie to help you get through the day or your goal.
There are a lot of us who want to improve in some areas of our personality and character and that’s where this age-old idiom plays its trick.
Next time you are nervous about an important meeting or a presentation, walk into the room with your shoulders straight, a smile, cheery voice, and pretend you are unfazed with what’s going to happen next even if you don’t feel it.
Eventually, you won’t be faking it.
‘Fake it till you make it’ essentially puts you in a state where you are even more receptive to learning. It’s a psychological hack for increased performance.
If we can clearly identify what it is that we are trying to modify and (convincingly) push ourselves to start changing with the sole purpose of it being natural over time. Amy Cuddy, a social psychologist, once suggested: “Don’t fake it until you make it. Fake it until you become it.”
There are many people in businesses and who are working and are figuring it out as they go along. But one thing that they all have in common is that they don’t show the world they don’t know it. They appear confident and they all believe in what they do. They know that even if they don’t have it right now, by just appearing to have it all, they will eventually get there.
Someone once described ‘Fake it till you make it as “You’re not really lying or pretending. You just have your timeline jumbled up.”
One of the biggest fears people have is that of public speaking. Some people rank this fear even higher than that of fear of death. It’s normal to feel nervous when you are in a difficult situation like that. Accept the nervousness as a part of life so you can embrace it for what it is and instead of fighting it, you let it fuel you to become better.
Think of nervousness as excitement. The physiological reaction is similar. Once you convince your mind into thinking it is exciting, you can let it enable you rather than something that holds you back.
A few years ago, I read about a Holocaust survivor who could barely speak English was looking for work. She came across a seamstress who asked if she could sew.
In desperation, she said yes even though she didn’t know how to. Her advice was, “If anyone offers you a job, take it, even if you aren’t qualified. If you’re smart and hungry, you’ll figure it out.”
While I wouldn’t recommend lying about your competencies and skillset, I would encourage you to have the confidence and eagerness to figure things out on the fly.
And if you aren’t confident enough, others don’t need to know that.
Fake it till you have become it.